For Stephanie: Top Ten Tidbits of Mothering Advice ~ 02.23.12
Subject to change as I grow and learn more about being the mom God wants me to be…
10. Many wise women have told me this: Enjoy every stage of your child’s development. Time is fleeting. You won’t believe how fast the time flies…Before you know it they are behind the wheel & looking at universities… (Jms 4.14 Life is a vapour) Enjoy them while they are with you…some day you have to let them go…
9. Model a life of Balance…whether it’s in the work you do, the food you eat, the leisure activities you enjoy…the list could go on and on. What does this mean? One example: Balance work and play. It’s important to take time to play, dance and sing with your children. When they grow up they will remember the time you spent playing with them, not whether your floor was sparkling clean. Give them undivided attention. Look them in the eyes when they are talking to you. Sometimes you need to demonstrate to them that they are more important than the dishes. (Eph 5.16-redeem the time)
8. Be there and Party. As they grow older, be there for them. Be there. Watch them play their sports…cheer them on at the spelling bee or the battle of the books, and be interested in their hobbies and pursuits, whatever they are. And Party with your children. Tell them you are proud of them. Celebrate their successes, remembering to thank God for giving them those gifts. Encourage them when they fail or fall. Let them fall…valuable lessons are learned when we make mistakes. Instil in them the desire to always do their best for God…and celebrate with them when they do! (Col 3.23; Eccl 9.10; 2Tim 2.15)
7. Let your yes be yes and your no, no. (Jms 5.12) If you make a promise…keep it…or…don’t make a promise you can’t keep. (Heb 10.23 God is the ultimate example of a promise keeper.) Along with this thought comes the idea of consistency. Be consistent with what you expect in your children. Be consistent in your discipline. If you say something is going to happen, follow through with it…which also means, be very careful what you do say.
6. Model gratitude and godliness with contentment (1Tim 6.6; 1Thess 5.18) – Being thankful – First to God for all His blessings, and also thankful to each other. Be content with what God has blessed you with. Teach the difference between needs and wants.
5. Model a love for learning and reading. A love for godly wisdom and knowledge. Show your children what “lifelong-learning” means…especially gaining more and more knowledge about God…we never know it all! (Prov 1.7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom)(Jms 1.5 Need wisdom…ask for it.)
4. Model Love – speak it and show it daily. Say it and do it. Tell them you love them and shower them with affection. Tell them that you are so glad God made them. God has created us all unique. We are all created in His image…but we are also different from one another. No one is exactly like them…they have different gifts and talents…take the time to recognize them and help them to develop them and use them for serving God and others. (Ps 139; Mt25) Love them for who God created them to be. Take that love outside the four walls of your home and touch your neighbourhood with love. (Jms 1.27)
3. Model confession and forgiveness (Col 3.13; Mt 6.12; 18.35) – we are all sinners. When you sin against your children, ask for forgiveness. Pray with them and for them. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for those unique “teachable moments.” Bedtimes are often special tender heart times…great times to talk about God and life…those times are often not forgotten.
2. Model the love of Christ and the church in your marriage (Eph 5.24-26; Col 3.18-20). This is one of the best gifts you can give your children…a model of a strong Christian marriage. Your children should see the love of Christ for His church being lived out before them. They should see love and respect demonstrated in your marriage. They should see parents who serve one another and put each other first. Protect your marriage. Put a hedge around your marriage and you will be protecting your children. Make your home a haven of rest, refuge and comfort for everyone.
1. Put God first. Love Him above all. (Deut 6.4-6; Lk 10.26-28) Put Him first before your husband and your children. Maintain a strong relationship with Christ by spending quiet time with Him daily. Take time to grow in grace and grow in your faith (2Peter 3.17-18). Model the reality that you live under God’s authority. Teach your children that they need to obey you, their parent…and demonstrate and tell them that you obey God. He is the head, the #1 in your life, your marriage and your family.